Like Father, Like Son: The Story of Cooler & Salsa
by Karatelover
Summary: Who was Sauza besides being Coolar's henchman? Where did he come from? Were Sauza and Zarbon ever friends? Are Sauza and Cooler even related? Find out the secret that they never told you on the DBZ series about Sauza and Cooler! Please find out in a fanfic you can never forget for better...or worse!
1. Chapter 1

Like Father, Like Son, The Story of Cooler and Salsa part 1

Long ago on Planet Freezer a celebration was being held, Cooler and Freezer were sitting in the throne room with their father King Cold, they were all on their thrones.

The Narrator of the story said, "A long time ago in the year 1957, on planet Freezer a very dark incident happened. There was a party going on in Freezer's honor, the planet name changed to Planet Freezer. It was a dark day for Cooler!"

King Cold was drunk, "Bring on the slave dancers and the sex slaves too!" he yelled drinking vodka.

Freezer then clapped his hands in excitement, "Oh goody sex slaves!"

Cooler was very jealous of Freezer, Freezer was his father's favorite son and was spoiled rotten compared to Cooler. Cooler was married at the time and had two daughters and two sons by different women. He was frowning, "At least you don't see me seducing any of those whores!" said Cooler.

Just then a pretty, fifteen year old primal changeling with black hair, turquoises skin and gold eyes sat on Freezer's lap, her name was Sunflower, "Hello Freezer, how are you tonight?" she asked in her thick French accent, they say that she came from the bayou of planet Freezer.

Freezer was enjoying himself, after all he was short and made fun of for it by his enemies and he didn't have a family of his own, he had never been married nor had he any children due to his infertility. He then chuckled and said, "Just fine dear, my favorite sex slave! Why couldn't you've been a ten-year old boy?"

While it was true that Freezer was a pedophile, Cooler was just watching Sunflower lap dancing on Freezer and her kissing Freezer's cold, purple lips, "Hey Freezer do you mind we don't want to hear about you raping ten-year old boys, god such poor taste! I would like to taste those lips of hers." Cooler said.

"I've told you before Cooler, I don't like you, I like your brother who makes such a good boy toy! Un jouet garçon " said Sunflower.

"I at least wish to know your name," said Cooler.

She got mad at him, "Its Sunflower, there satisfied?!" she said angrily getting up and walking away.

Now poor delusional Cooler thought he was in love, but in real life that was far from the truth, "  
Oh Freezer I want to fuck her, maybe make her my queen when I take over the thrown." Cooler said staring at her dancing some more.

Freezer looked at Cooler, "Be careful Cooler, your wife is devoted to you, if you commit adultery then she's just kill you!" Cooler said.

"So I've committed it many time." Cooler said watching her walk out of the throne room, "Oh look she's leaving, I'm going to follow her into the hallways." With that Cooler got up from his throne and started following her.

Sunflower did not seem to notice that Cooler was following her, "Hello Sunflower." Cooler said.

She stopped walking and turned around, "Hi Cooler." She said acting coy.

"So I got some oh, a one hundred dollar bill, if you want to screw me." He said waving it in front of her.

"Cooler no, I would never have sex with you ever, not even if you were the last man in the universe, besides you're married." She said.

"Please Sunny, I'm very rich you know." He said.

"I don't care about your money and I don't care about you!" she said.

"It's your job to have sex with me! I may be arrogant, but at least I have feelings too." Cooler said.

"I would rather seduce Freezer then you!" she said.

"What? I'm more handsome then he is and you will end up seducing me, my brother has everything that I don't, you don't know how much I loathe him." Cooler said.

"Well I'm someone who likes him better then you, and he is the ultimate tyrant of the universe! You would suck at it!" she said.

She had gone way to far, Cooler got pissed off, "That does it you made me angry, now I'm going to have to use violence on you!" he punched her in the eye and picked her up throwing her on his back.

"Where are you taking me?!" she asked.

Cooler took her into a bedroom and threw her onto the bed, he ripped her underwear off and started violating her, "Yah why don't you just scream bitch! See I'm just better then Freezer! Fuck me you bitch!" the enraged Cooler yelled.

Kiwi happened to walk by and saw the door opened and Cooler raping Sunflower, "Cooler what in the hell are you doing?! Get off of her!" he yelled. Kiwi tried to get Cooler off of her, but Cooler threw him across the room, Kiwi who was terrified, ran out of the room.

About an hour later, after he finished raping her, Cooler grabbed Sunflower and went onto his balcony, the then threw her off, but she ran off. "Damn the bitch ran off!" he yelled.

A few months later, out in the Bayou on the other side of Planet Freezer in the swamp, there was a mansion. Eugene, a handsome primal changeling who was 6'1 feet tall with gold eyes, black hair and turquoises skin was a rich fisherman. His sister, Sunflower, showed up at the mansion with black eyes, like she had been punched.

He looked at her with shock, "Sister come into the house!" he said in his French Cajon accent, with that they went into the house.

He poured at cup of tea, "Sister it's been a little too long, why are you having those ojos de negro?" he asked referring to her bruised eyes.

She sighed, "A customer got a little tough with me, but they always beat me up anyways. Oh by the way I was raped by Cooler, King Cold's oldest son." She said.

"What! How did you come across the Cold family?" asked Eugene.

"I was working as a sex slave in the palace and a dancer, and he beat me up and raped me and threw me off the balcony! That son of a gun!" she said.

"When did this happen?" asked Eugene.

"About three or four months ago, after he threw me off of the balcony I got a job so I could buy a ticket back home. I'm walking much funnier than usual because I'm recovering from a broken leg. The strangest thing is that after he raped me, I was vomiting once in a while and now I've been feeling strange. I feel weird movements in me." She said naively.

"What kind of movements?" Eugene asked.

"As if something was kicking me." She said.

"Did you see a doctor?" asked Eugene.

"No, but I get the feeling that I might be pregnant." Sunflower said.

"When was your last period?" asked Eugene.

"Before Cooler raped me." She said.

Eugene's eyes grew widely, "Oh God we have to get you to a doctor!" said Eugene.

So they went to the doctor's office, and the test results were in as a strange tradition Eugene got to see the test results first, then he came back into the room. "Sunflower dear sister, I have some terrible news. Based on the test results, you're somewhere around five months pregnant." Eugene said.

"What! That son of a bitch!" she yelled and started crying.

"They didn't exterminate the fetus, so you're going to have to carry it for the remaining months." Eugene said.

"Ok fine, oh great it kicked again! I want Cooler dead! I'll raise this child!" she said.

"Ok fine it's your choice." Eugene said.

"Dear brother will you help me?" asked Sunflower.

"Yes I will." Eugene said hugging Sunflower.

It was years later, Salsa was grown up, well he was eighteen years old, was about 5'10 feet tall with blond hair, dark gold eyes, and blue skin. He was handsome too.

The narrator of the story said, "So Sunflower bore Cooler a son and his future henchman, now that the darks days are over for her, but beginning for Salsa."

Salsa spoke up in his Creole sounding French accent, "Uncle, I have un question, who was my father?"

"I think your mother should answer that question." Eugene said.

"I've been asking her for years and she still won't answer me!" said Salsa.

He went into the mansion, "Oh mother!" he yelled.

"Salsa there you are, let me look at you for a minute," she looked at him but then those horrible images of Cooler came back to her in her mind, "Get away from me!" she yelled hitting Salsa with a newspaper.

"Mother what's wrong?!" asked Salsa.

"When I look at you I see your father's face!" said Sunflower.

"Who is he?!" asked Salsa.

"Lord Cooler is your father!" said Sunflower.

"You married Lord Cooler?!" asked the naïve Salsa.

Sunflower then sat down, "No I was a sex slave working in the palace at the time he raped me and that's how you were conceived." She said.

"I don't even know what rape means!" said Salsa.

"Oh Salsa, I've hidden you from the real world haven't I? It's when someone uses sexual intercourse on someone without their permission, you're not even a full primal changeling like your uncle, cousin and I." she said.

"In other words?" asked Salsa.

"In other words, you're half changeling, you're just a hybrid and it's not a big deal." Sunflower said.

"No big deal! No wonder I can't transform like you and the rest of my known family! That explains why I have three toes on each foot instead of five! You told me that I inherited a genetic disorder from your father!" said Salsa.

"I lied, he didn't have three toes on each foot." Sunflower said.

"I know what I must do now! I will now go on a crusade and join my father in his quest for the thrown! Goodbye mother and uncle I will write you!" with that the delusional Salsa went upstairs and started packing his stuff.

Hours later, he got onto the bus and said goodbye to his mother and kissed her on the cheek and was on his way to the palace, a day later he got to the palace and some guards were guarding it they stopped and looked at him. "Hi I'm looking for Lord Cooler." Salsa said.

"Let's beat him up and take him to Cooler ourselves!" said one of the guards.

"No no, you don't understand I need to see him…" before Salsa could finish the other guard punched him in the gut and picked him up and headed for the main thrown room.

Meanwhile in the throne room, Zarbon all the sudden went poker faced on everyone then eased up, "I just got a vision, someone is coming to see Lord Cooler!" said Zarbon.

"What another assassin? Where do you get such silly ideas from?" asked Freezer chuckling.

"Hush Freezer, your sorcerer might be right!" said Cooler pointing to the doors opening and the guards brining Salsa in. They threw Salsa to the ground.

"Well what do you know I was right again." Zarbon said with a laidback smile on his face.

Cooler looked at Salsa bewildered, "Who is this idiot? Are you here to see me?" asked Cooler.

"Yes sir I am, I'm Salsa your son!" yelled Salsa.

"What an outrage, how many times has this actually happened?!" asked Cooler.

"About ten times." Zarbon said.

"Don't get cute with me sorcerer!" said Cooler.

"I have a name you know!" said Zarbon.

Zarbon looked at Salsa very carefully, using his empathy ability he then said, "He's right about one thing, he's half changeling and I can sense it in his blood." Zarbon said.

"You can't possibly be my son, I've never seen you before!" said Cooler.

"But I am, my mother's name is Sunflower, you raped her about seventeen years ago. She has blue skin, black hair, and gold eyes! She worked as a sex slave in this palace; she was fifteen years old at the time! She used to be Freezer's sex slave!" said Salsa.

"It's true, I was there when it happened, Cooler held her down like a wild boar, I tried to stop him, but he kept on raping her." Kiwi said.

"He does speak the truth, he has your smile sir and your attitude!" said Zarbon.

"That doesn't mean a thing, I want a DNA test and I want it now!" said Cooler.

Well Cooler got that DNA test, and everyone was waiting outside the clinic, Liya then came out with the test results, she had been studying medicine for quite some time now, "Sire the test results are positive." She said.

"He's your son, I told you so!" said Zarbon.

"Nobody likes a know-it -all Zarbon, I've been searching for him my whole life!" said Cooler, although he made a horrible person and husband, he was paternal if you think about it.

"I knew my vision was right!" said Zarbon.

"What vision?" Freezer asked.

"Oh you don't remember sir? I had a vision that he'd find his son and Salsa would join his father's side. " Zarbon said.

"Oh my son!" said Cooler.

"Father!" said Salsa hugging each other and crying.

Freezer wasn't the least bit impressed, well this was fucked up, who knew a rapist could end up loving a child that he had with the woman he violated? Then matters took a worst turn when Freezer saw Zarbon and Kiwi crying, "Zarbon why are you crying?!" asked Freezer.

"It's just so touching and yet very strange! Oh Freezer you're like a father to me, you raised me like a son!" and then Zarbon hugged Freezer, which he hadn't done since he was a young boy, "Oh Freezer I love you!" he said.

Freezer started crying, "Oh Zarbon I love you too! Oh what am I kidding, Zarbon quit crying you big sissy! Quit hugging me you're crushing my bones!" said Freezer who stopped crying and came to his senses.

"Oh Salsa, how would you like to go to a movie with me, just you and me, to make up for old times?" asked Cooler.

"Thanks dad, do I have any siblings?" asked Salsa.

"Oh yes wait till you meet them!" Cooler said walking outside with Salsa to get Salsa's stuff.

"Oh that is so touching!" said Zarbon.

"That is so sick!" said Freezer.

"Sir I have a question, can you and I just the two of us conquer a planet together or get a drink, no wait go to the movies together like father and son?" asked Zarbon.

"Zarbon no, why don't you go play with your stuff, I'm too busy." Freezer said.

"You're always too busy! You never have time for me!" said Zarbon.

"I'm not your real father and I never will be! I may have raised you, but you're just my slave to me now, but one who gets spoiled rotten, oh go to school!" said Freezer.

"But I don't go to school anymore." Zarbon said.

"Oh go to your room or whatever you do in your spare time!" said Freezer.

"Yes sir." Said Zarbon with a disappointed look on his face and with that he left the room.

End of part 1


	2. Chapter 2

Like Father, Like Son The Story of Cooler and Salsa, part 2

Poor Zarbon was depressed so depressed that he was watching daytime TV with his rubber ducky PJs on and holding an alien stuffed animal that Freezer bought for him when he was a young boy. He had a box of tissues, he was infamously known for crying when he was upset making him an emotional butterfly.

The man on TV said, "Oh Amber, I'm going into surgery and my father won't be there to witness it. Because unlike other fathers he's not even there, he never has been there for me and probably never will be."

The woman on the TV then said, "Oh Perkins, don't go into surgery so soon, we have too many times we've spent together and now none we'll ever spend again!"

Zarbon blow his nose, then where was a knock on the door, he got up and answered it, it was Apple, "Hi Apple what do you want?" Zarbon asked.

"Well can I watch soap operas with you?" Apple asked.

"Sure come on in." Zarbon said, Apple came in and in few minutes they were both crying while watching those retarded soap operas.

The next day, Cooler was out conquering planets, meanwhile Salsa was in the palace. He did not have any friends there and he had no idea where he was, "Where am I? I need to find my way around this place!" he thought.

"Maybe I can help," a voice said, Salsa turned around it was the heir to Freezer's throne and his top slave and general Zarbon.

For some particular reason Salsa found Zarbon pleasant looking, though primal changelings were attractive, but Zarbon had that rare Cyrillic beauty which he inherited from his grandmother. "Hi," Salsa said enchanted.

"Hello, how are you?" Zarbon asked.

"What is your name?" Salsa asked.

"My name is Zarbon Mustashi, nice to meet you, Salsa was it?" Zarbon asked trying to remember his name.

"Yes it is, I'm a Creole, I've heard of a warrior like you, back at home you are on every girl's door and lips." Salsa said.

"Oh yes I'm famous for being a soothsayer to Freezer and I am the heir to his empire, not to mention his top slave." Zarbon said.

"Are you really some kind of sorcerer?" Salsa asked.

"Yes, I speak to spirits and conjure demons up so that people can practice fighting before they go on missions." Zarbon said.

"So were you born on this planet?" Salsa asked.

"No I wasn't but I don't really want to talk about my past, I try not to dwell on it, but otherwise it doesn't really work." Zarbon said.

"So how old are you?" Salsa asked.

"I'm seventeen years old; I was born in 1958 earth years." Zarbon said.

"Me too, but I'm eighteen years old, are you really Freezer's adoptive son?" Salsa asked.

"Yes I am come on I'll show you around." Zarbon said taking Salsa by the hand.

Zarbon drove a black convertible with Salsa in the front seat; he was listening to dance club music, "So where are we going?" Salsa asked.

"To the city, it only takes an hour to get there, it's a beautiful day outside why waste it inside? We're going to the beach and going to make ourselves, well at least myself darker, I'm not dark-skinned like my parents were." Zarbon said.

"I don't know I don't really like going to the beach, besides I didn't think the pack a swimsuit!" Salsa said.

"Nonsense I packed two just in case and you can borrow one!" Zarbon said.

It was a beautiful day at the beach, and the palm trees were swaying, big waves were rolling, the sun was out big and bright, nothing could possibly be better than this. Zarbon and Salsa changed into their swimsuits and went onto the beach; while Zarbon was barefoot, Salsa had shoes on still to hide his three toes. They sat down in the sand, "Zarbon how did you get to be so big and bulky?" Salsa asked.

"I was fat when I was a little kid, then one day I lost weight and gained more muscle, I lift weights like any normal person, Shasha trained me and he still does." Zarbon said.

"What languages do you know?" Salsa asked.

"I know French, Japanese, Namic, a little Latin and English." Zarbon said.

"I only know French and English, what are your hobbies?" Salsa asked.

"Wow I wonder how you get girls to like you, and when you get them do you sleep with them?" Salsa asked.

"Wow that's a pretty personal question." Zarbon said.

All the sudden two cute primal changeling women came up to Zarbon and Salsa, "Hey good looking, who's your friend?" one of the primal changeling girls asked.

"This is Salsa, he's new to this side of Planet Freezer, and he comes from the Bayou." Zarbon said.

"Wow. Comment pouvez-vous dire que votre mignon ce gars-là?" one of the girls asked.

Salsa rolled his eyes, "Like you just said." He said.

Zarbon laughed, "Its all right I appreciate the complement." Zarbon said.

"Want to go swimming with us?" the other girl asked.

"I do!" Zarbon said.

"No thanks I'll just bask in the Sun." Salsa said.

"Come on the water is cold and I need to cool down!" Zarbon said.

"I can't swim!" Salsa said.

"Come on I'll take your shoes off," one of the changeling women said who bent down to infection Salsa's boots.

"No you don't understand!" Salsa said.

"What that you get bunions, I get those too, never stopped me from showing my feet." Zarbon said.

"No please don't!" Salsa said. It was too late, as soon as the primal girl removed one of his boots, what she saw was a piece of tape.

"Ok let's remove this piece of duck tape shall we? I mean it's going to get wet," the primal girl said.

"No please don't do that!" Salsa said. Again, it was too late, but this time there was an even bigger shock then the first, instead of five toes which normal primal changelings had, there were three blue toes spread out like a changeling's toes, the girl then looked at those odd toes and screamed and ran off.

"I can't believe it, he has three toes, that is hilarious!" The other primal changeling said who started laughing hard and fell down still laughing.

Zarbon was just shocked to see them too, Salsa then got embarrassed and ran off, "Salsa wait please!" Zarbon cried.

Hours later back at the palace Salsa wouldn't come out of his room, Cooler knocked on the door.

"Come on Salsa! Please come out, I'll take you out for ice cream!

"Go away father it's because of you that I ended up with Changeling feet!" Salsa said.

"Uh primal changelings are so dramatic!" Cooler said.

"I'll get him to come out!" Kiwi said, he walked up to the door and banged on it, "Hey Salsa you have to come out of your room sometime, I know where we can score some cute girls!" Kiwi said snickering to himself.

"Leave me alone!" Salsa said.

"Sorry I tried." Kiwi said.

"I'll talk to him," Zarbon said, he broke the down the door and went into room, Salsa was nowhere to be seen. "Salsa where are you?!" asked Zarbon.

All the sudden Zarbon noticed some movement in the closet, and he went over to it, "Salsa I know you're in there." Zarbon said.

"No I'm not!" Salsa said.

"Oh come on Salsa, any moron could tell that you're in there!" Zarbon said.

"I don't want to come out of the closet!" yelled Salsa.

"So he's saying that he doesn't want to admit to being homosexual?" asked Kiwi who started laughing.

"This is serious Kiwi, we have a friend that needs our help!" Zarbon said.

"You mean your help, I'm out of here!" Kiwi said, with that he ran down the hall quickly.

"Oh for the love of Muhammad!" yelled Zarbon. He then did a karate chop with his hand and split the closet door in half, kicking the other half down. "There you are!" Zarbon said.

"No you don't understand, nobody likes me! I've been made fun of my whole life for having changeling feet!" Salsa said.

"Look I transform into an ugly creature that nobody wants so does that make you feel better?" asked Zarbon.

"Not really, at least you can hide your other form, the only way I can hide my feet is if I were shoes!" Salsa said crying.

"Look I don't know how to make you feel better but maybe we can go to a movie or something." Zarbon said.

"You want to go to a movie with me?" asked Salsa.

"Yes we're cousins aren't we?" asked Zarbon.

"Yes I'll go with you!" Salsa then laughed hard and hugged Zarbon and touched his butt.

Zarbon's eyes grew wide, "Well I didn't know you were that affectionate!" he said a little uncomfortable.

All the sudden Salsa fell asleep on him, "Cooler I don't want to say this, but your son has fallen asleep on me!" yelled Zarbon.

"Hum it looks like he's inherited the family curse." Cooler said.

"Family curse?" asked Zarbon.

"Narcolepsy, it's a sleeping disorder that occurs in changelings." Cooler said.

"Oh boy," Zarbon said rolling his eyes.

That evening when Salsa woke up, he and Zarbon went to a movie like Zarbon promised. They sat in the theater eating popcorn and drinking tea, they were watching a movie on the screen it was with a man and a woman kissing.

"Wow this movie is amazing." Salsa said.

"Yes it sure is." Zarbon said.

All the sudden Salsa put his arm around Zarbon, Zarbon's eyes grew wide and looked over at Salsa who was not looking at him, "Salsa what are you doing?" he asked.

"Oh sorry," Salsa said taking his arm back and putting it in his lap.

Zarbon rolled his eyes suspiciously and continued to watch the screen, then Salsa did another unthinkable thing, he put his hand on Zarbon's leg, Zarbon's eyes then went from the screen to his leg, "Salsa knock it off!" Zarbon said taking his hand and putting it back onto Salsa's own lap.

"Ops sorry." Salsa said.

Zarbon took a drink of green tea from his straw and then Salsa once again laid it too soon on Zarbon, this time he went in for a kiss, it did not make any sense, before Zarbon could notice he just got up and left to go to the bathroom.

After the movie the evening was even more awkward, Zarbon was doing some training with Shasha that brutal henchman of Freezer's and Dodoria's best friend in the entire universe. "So Shasha I have a question do you promise not to tell anyone?" asked Zarbon.

They were in karate suits and were using sticks to block one another, "What is your concern young primal changeling?" asked Shasha in his thick Russian accent.

"Well it's my cousin, I went to the movies with him and he put his arm around my neck." Zarbon said. 

"What?" asked Shasha.

"So what I'm trying to figure out is if he has the hots for me or not." Zarbon naively said.

"Little primal changeling, you are so naïve, usually when man puts his arm around girl it means that he loves her." Shasha said, even though he too was clueless about Zarbon's situation.

"So does that mean that he's in love with me?" asked Zarbon.

"It means he admires you, not loves you. It don't hurt to look at porno once in awhile." Shasha said laughing, then he swung the still at Zarbon's legs so fast that Zarbon fell down.

"God Shasha do you have to be so hard on me?" asked Zarbon.

"In real world young primal changeling, hard as hell. Get used to it! Now its time to transform!" Shasha said.

"Oh do we have to?" asked Zarbon.

"In real world nobody gives you chance, you have to take it!" Shasha said and he started transforming, he looked like a hideous reptile now, he was taller, bulkier and his red eyes had some glowing in them.

"Ok I guess I have no choice," Zarbon thought. So he too transformed into a taller, bulker, reptilian looking version of himself.

Then there was a knock on the door, "Come in!" Shasha yelled.

Liya then came into the room, she looked at Zarbon's other form, it was horrible looking. Hard telling who was more uglier looking, Zarbon or Shasha. "Zarbon Freezer wants me to steal you away," Liya said.

"Do I have to?" asked Zarbon.

"Yes you do, no excuses come right now!" Liya said.

"Hold on let me transform back!" Zarbon said.

"No don't do it yet, I need you to stay in that form so that you can get used to it more!" yelled Shasha.

"Damn it!" yelled Zarbon.

As Liya and Zarbon were walking down the hallway, Zarbon dressed up in a burka so that nobody knew it was him, he went into the throne room where it was just Freezer. Liya then went back outside the throne room to wait for Zarbon and escort him back.

Freezer squinted and all the saw was Zarbon completely hidden under a burka, "Zarbon what are you doing dressed in a burka, you look like a cross dresser! Take that stupid sign of modesty off immediately!" Freezer yelled.

"Is anyone else here or watching?" asked Zarbon.

"No, are you transformed?" asked Freezer.

Zarbon the sighed and took the burka off, yep he was still ugly, "You wanted to see me?" asked Zarbon.

"Well I'm having an anniversary party to honor my coronation ceremony in five days. " Freezer said.

"What does that have to do with me?"asked Zarbon.

"I want you to be one of the hosts." Freezer said.

"Of course I will Freezer." Zarbon said.

"You can borrow one of my crowns if you want to, a pair of earrings and of course some rings to look more elegant." Freezer said smiling.

"Can you go get them now!" Zarbon asked.

"Why?" asked Freezer.

"So that I can walk back not looking like I'm a cross dresser, and I think if I wear more jewelry when I'm hideous then it might bring out the inner beauty in me!" Zarbon said.

"Sure under one condition! Try not to get too friendly with Salsa if you know what I mean." Freezer said.

"Why not Freezer?" asked Zarbon.

"Because he's a hybrid, a mutt, a defect!" Freezer yelled.

"Hey I'm biracial!" Zarbon said.

"Aliens could care less what skin color or ethnic background you come from, it's actually species that we're more worried about since we're more interconnected." Freezer said.

End of part 2


	3. Chapter 3

_Like Father, Like Son The Story of Cooler and Salsa, part 3_

Zarbon walked out of the court room wearing that old head crown that Freezer gave to him, earrings, and rings, no surprise there. Only he was still in his other form, Liya didn't wait around, she left in a flash and while he was walking down the hallway, excluding primal changelings and changelings, people stared at him or ran away.

For example he walked by Cooler, "Hello Cooler!" Zarbon said.

"Hello Zarbon." Cooler said not caring in the world if Zarbon was hideous looking, or wearing fine jewelry.

He came across Dodoria, "Hello Dodoria lovely weather we having!" Zarbon said in a friendly tone.

Dodoria looked at him and started laughing, "God the only thing more plain and stupid looking other than that form is the jewelry you're wearing with it!" Dodoria fell down laughing.

Zarbon frowned, "Well that wasn't very nice." He said and he continued to walk to the training room where Shasha was waiting for him.

Then when Kiwi walked up to him Zarbon did what he naturally did, "Hello Kiwi!" He yelled.

Kiwi took one look at Zarbon and went running down the hall, maybe he wasn't used to seeing Zarbon so much in his other form. Zarbon shrugged his shoulders, "I guess the jewelry didn't make that big of a difference." Zarbon thought.

He finally got to the training room where Shasha was and went in, Shasha was reading a magazine, although he wasn't that good at reading English. Shasha was still in his ugly form and looked at Zarbon. He looked shocked, "What is this?" asked Shasha all angry.

"I wanted to look good so that people would like me." Zarbon said.

"That's not point to transforming, point to transforming is so you'll get best mate in world and so that you can scare your enemies and defend yourself!" Shasha yelled.

"But I don't like being scary, I like to be around other people." Zarbon said.

"Are you trying to get raped or something?" asked Shasha.

"No why?" asked Zarbon naively.

"Because you look like you're gay! Primal changelings aren't usually homosexual!" Shasha yelled enraged.

"What? I'm not gay! I'm bisexual!" Zarbon said.

"In other words?" asked Shasha.

"In other words I love parading myself in front of men and women so that they adore me! If you're insisting that its just men who impress me, then no." Zarbon said.

"All right which sex do you like to do it with?" asked Shasha.

"I would prefer a girl no doubt about it." Zarbon said.

"Ok enough of this talk! I want you to be fearsome! I'm not teaching you to transform just so you can make yourself look pretty!" Shasha yelled.

"There is nothing wrong with looking pretty! When you're more beautiful people want to be near you!" Zarbon said.

"Then why don't I ever see you use your beauty to draw women and men into bed with you?" asked Shasha.

"Because I'm a gentleman, gentlemen don't take their panties off when they're not supposed to!" Zarbon said.

Shasha ended up laughing, but then decided to do something that was the most helpful to Zarbon since training him as a warrior, "Ok here is deal, I'll give you some porno to watch I warn you it's in Russian, but that's not point. You need to watch males doing it to each other, and females doing it to each other, and whichever one you like, you either end up gay or straight, you're going to have to jump off fence sometime!" Shasha said.

That night, Zarbon was in bed and watching one of Shasha's pronos, he first watched one with two dudes making out and having butt sex, "Ой Йаша! Я тебя люблю!" one of the guys on the video said, starting to make out with the other guy.

Zarbon almost couldn't look at it, "Ew that's gross." Zarbon said.

"Я хочу тебя Андрей!" the other guy said, and then it happened, Andrey stuck his penis into Yasha's butt hole.

Zarbon's eyes grew wide, bad memories started coming back to him when Freezer used to do the same thing to him as a child, he never liked it, and now he was freaking out and hid under the covers. The movie ended and he put another one in, it was the two women that Shasha was talking about.

"Maybe this will be better." Zarbon said, ah so young and naïve that Zarbon was.

For the first scene he saw two girls wearing firemen outfits, "Ok this doesn't look bad so far." Thought Zarbon.

Then it happened, "Анна, я хочу тебя!" yelled one of the girls showing her boobs.

Zarbon's eyes grew wide, "Yep its good so far!" he said smiling.

Then the other girl took her shirt off too, and showed her boobs, which looked like they had implants in them, "Ok those boobs are so fake!" Zarbon said.

"Ой Надя, я тебя люблю!" the other girl said making out with the other girl.

"Wow this is awesome!" Zarbon thought.

Then it happened, one of the girls started rubbing the other on the boobs, and Zarbon had memories of when Freezer used to do the same thing to him, only Zarbon was flat chested. His eyes grew wide and he once again hid under the covers.

The next day Shasha was waiting for Zarbon to come to training practice, then Zarbon came in infuriated with those two god awful tapes, "What did you decide?" asked Shasha.

Zarbon threw the tapes at Shasha, "That didn't help at all! That only made me want to cut my wrists!" Zarbon then walked out of the room angry.

"Where are you going? We have training to do!" Shasha said.

A few nights later, Salsa and Cooler were getting ready for the party, Cooler then said, "Son, didn't you notice that Zarbon seems to have a better status then you do?" asked Cooler.

"What do you mean father?" asked Salsa.

"Well he's a pure blooded primal changeling whereas you're a hybrid." Cooler said.

"Yes father I'm envious of him, I wish I was a pure breed, although…never mind." Salsa said blushing.

"What are you trying to say?" asked Cooler.

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think I'm in love with him." Salsa said.

"Ew…he's your cousin!" Cooler said.

"I know it sounds strange to you, but he's a really nice guy, he seems to care about me so much!" Salsa went on to say.

"But he's your cousin, he's not your blood its true, but I don't want you loving him you hear me?" Cooler then got mad and slapped him in the face.

"Yes father." Salsa said looking down at the floor.

That evening everyone was in the ballroom, Zarbon was there of course, he was dressed up elegantly, had his hair in a braid with beads going threw his braid, he wore a red uniform with a cape attached to it, wore earrings, the crown and earrings that Freezer let him borrow, he also grew a thin mustache. He was holding doors open for people, Freezer stood next to him.

"Freezer can I quit now, I want to have some fun." Zarbon said.

"Sure Zarbon, I'll get Shasha to be the door host." Freezer went to get Shasha.

Shasha then walked up to the door and nealed to his master, "Freezer." Shasha said.

Freezer left and before Zarbon could go into the other room Shasha grabbed his arm, "Freezer is watching you!" Shasha said licking his lips.

"Get lost Shasha!" Zarbon yanked his arm away from Shasha and went over to the wine table and grabbed some white wine.

His ex girlfriend Liya walked over to the table, "Hello Zarbon, enjoying the party?" asked Liya.

"Yes I suppose so Liya." Zarbon said.

"Some girls want to meet you, they're friends of mine." She said.

"Ok Liya let's meet these friends of yours." Zarbon said raising his eyebrows.

They both walked over to the group of elegantly dressed primal changelings and regular changelings, Salsa was already over there wearing a tux, "So I was wondering if you're not busy….." before he could finish Liya interrupted him.

"Hey girls, I found him!" Liya said smiling.

"Oh Zarbon!" They all said and they ditched Salsa and went over to Zarbon instead.

"So I was wondering if you…..? Sandy? Frisha? Ariel? Where are you going?" asked Salsa confused.

"You're boring us to death Salsa, Zarbon has many interesting stories!" Ariel said.

"So ladies having a good time?" asked the painfully shy Zarbon.

"No we're board like hell," Sandy said.

"Oh Zarbon how did you get the muscular?" asked Frisha.

"Well it's a long story so to make a long story short, I lift weights all the time!" Zarbon said.

"Oh cool, god you're so handsome can you be my husband?" asked Frisha.

Zarbon started to sweat, although he was vain he was painfully shy around women, "Sorry babes, I would but I'm not allowed to have a mate until Freezer dies." Zarbon said.

Salsa who was jealous decide to mock them, "God you're so handsome, can you be my husband? I'm sorry but I'm not allowed to marry unitl Freezer dies! Ew I'm going to be sick!" Salsa said.

Everyone ignored Salsa, "Aren't you married? You are upon marriage age," Sandy said.

"Yes I am old enough to marry, but I'm not allowed to, don't get me wrong I love women, but Freezer said that women were off limits, that includes making love to them." Zarbon said.

The girls all rolled their eyes, this plan of having sex with him wasn't working, "Your accent is so sexy." Ariel said.

"I guess it is, it's the way I've always talked, but your accent is similar to mine and that makes it extra sexy!" Zarbon said.

Everyone laughed while Salsa took a plan glass and smashed it against his face trying to knock himself out, damn it didn't work. "Yah its not French sounding and stupid like Salsa's, he talks like he's from the deep south." Arial said.

"Well I didn't think it made a big difference, I mean there are other French speaking people on this planet," Zarbon said.

"Why that little bitch!" Salsa said getting angry at what Ariel said.

"Now don't make fun of his voice its not nice." Zarbon said.

"Oh my dream boy." Salsa thought.

"If all Creoles spoke proper French like Cooler then I'm sure that everyone would like them more." Sandy said.

Salsa was now pissed, "Oh yah, well!" He was speechless, everyone looked at him, then he did something totally random, he got mad enough to go over to Liya and start chocking her.

"Salsa are you out of your mind?" asked Zarbon.

"Stop flirting with him you demons! You succubus!" Salsa said.

"Salsa stop it!" Zarbon then grabbed him and got him off of Liya. "What in the hell is your problem?" asked Zarbon.

"I'm going now!" with that Salsa ran out of the ballroom.

"What's wrong with him?" asked Zarbon.

"He's so stupid and psycho." Ariel said.

"Excuse me ladies!" Zarbon then ran after Salsa.

Salsa was outside the palace crying hard by a tree, Zarbon then found him and walked up to him, "What's wrong Salsa?" asked Zarbon.

"Oh Zarbon, how could you go along with that crowd? Can't I ever be liked if I weren't a Creole or a hybrid?" asked Salsa, with mascara dripping from his eyelashes.

Zarbon had a surprise look on his face, not even Zarbon wore mascara. "I like you even though you're different. I stood up for you in there, you may have not known it, but I did." Zarbon said.

All the sudden Salsa smiled and hugged Zarbon with his eyes closed, "Oh Zarbon I love you!" he said.

"Of course you do, I'm your cousin, after all Freezer's men keep complaining to Freezer that I'm adopted." Zarbon said.

"No I mean I really love you, you seem to be the only one who cares about me other than Cooler!" Salsa said.

Zarbon smiled uncomfortably, "Well I'm glad I'm your friend." He said.

All the sudden Salsa pushed Zarbon against a tree, "No you idiot! I'm in love with you! I love your long, beautiful green hair! I love your eyes, along with your turquoise skin!" Salsa said licking his lips.

"Everyone likes that about me." Zarbon said nervously.

"No you stupid son of a whore! I want to have butt sex with you, I want to marry you!" Salsa said.

Zarbon laughed hard, "Hey I'm not marriage material, Freezer said so, besides even if I wanted to have sex with you, I promised Freezer I wouldn't have sex with another soul until the day he dies. How could you love me like that, we're cousins not boyfriends." Zarbon said.

"I love you Zarbon, I want to be like you, I look up to you! I know that this planet accepts homosexuality, but I love you! Give me your love or I'll rape you!" Salsa said.

Zarbon got nervous, "Hey I don't know why you're acting like a psycho, but stop it you're scaring me!" Zarbon said getting angry.

"No I won't I want to fuck you! I love you!" Salsa said.

Salsa also forgot that Zarbon was taller than him, Zarbon then got mad and grabbed him by the neck and threw him against the tree, "You're sick!" he yelled and ran back inside.

When Zarbon was inside he went back over to the girls, "What happened Zarbon? Did you talk to him?" asked Liya.

"Oh I talked to him all right, the little bastard tried to impose his will on me!" Zarbon said.

"He did? But you two are cousins!" Liya said.

"I know and I'm going to tell Freezer on him," Zarbon then walked over to Freezer. "Freezer, Salsa tried to have sex with me." Zarbon said.

"I'll take care of this Zarbon." Freezer said.

All the sudden the psychotic Salsa came running into the ballroom, "Zarbon you will fuck me now!" he yelled laughing.

"Guards arrest him, he'll get 500 lashes!" Freezer said.

The guards grabbed Salsa, 'I will have sex with you Zarbon!" yelled Salsa as the guards carried him out of the room.

"I'm going to my room now!" Zarbon said and then ran out of the ballroom.

Salsa got whipped in the arena in front of Freezer, Cooler and Zarbon. Zarbon thought it was a little too harsh, but Freezer didn't give a care what he thought. While Freezer and Cooler were arguing about what Freezer did to Zarbon when he was a child, Zarbon had had enough of this stupid conversation, "Stop it right now!" he yelled.

Zarbon then went down to the arena without Freezer's permission and walked up to Salsa, Salsa did not get whipped five hundred times, it was more like fifty. "Hello Salsa? Why did you try to hurt me?" asked Zarbon.

"I wanted you to be the satisfaction of every fantasy I have!" Salsa said laughing like a maniac, it was clear now, the friendship between Zarbon and Salsa was officially over, however they were stuck as cousins.

Zarbon got mad, "I thought you were my friend, I guess I was wrong. You're as sick as Freezer!" Zarbon said.

All the sudden Zarbon had a puzzled look on his face, he saw what appeared to be Salsa licking the ground, "I licked the ground for you Zarbon!" he said as he kept licking the ground.

"Freezer excort me back to the palace!" Zarbon said walking back over to Freezer.

Cooler looked at Salsa and then walked into the arena, "Come on Salsa I'll escort you home," Cooler said.

"Yes father." Salsa then got up and walked beside Cooler.

"By the way, don't call me father anymore, around my men. Call me lord Cooler." Cooler said.

"Can I call you father in private?" asked Salsa.

"Yes you can, but stay away from Zarbon, he's not your type anyways." Cooler said walking with Salsa home.

Freezer looked at Salsa and then looked at Zarbon, "Wait he hit on you?" he asked.

"Yes he did, isn't that why he was punished?" asked Zarbon.

"Yes it was, lets go home I'll get the cook to make you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich." Freezer said walking home with Zarbon.

"Peanut butter and jelly, that's my favorite!" Zarbon said.

That day Zarbon and Salsa pretty much destroyed their friendship, after that Salsa tried to seduce Zarbon even more, but then Freezer got so pissed off at him that it cost Salsa the life of his mother. It also remained a secret that Salsa was Cooler's son, until now.

End of Story


End file.
